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Tunnels, Words, Alfred Hitchcock, Whatever.

March 12th, 2001 - 8:30 am damnit!

I'm Currently Avoiding:

Yeah. A morning entry. These things scare me. They're even worse when I've not slept, but even the sheer fact that I am awake, whether it be because I woke up at 3 am or because I haven't been to bed, is frightening. And if I'm ever awake on purpose at 8:30 in the morning specifically to write a diary entry....kill me. I am bored bored bored bored bored. And just in case you didn't get the message. I am Bored. Last time I was bored, I ended up making all these additions to my diary and fiddling with things. You know...the jump bar, all those new pages, the poll, etc. That's what I do when I haven't slept for awhile or I get bored. It's kind of sad. It makes my diary really pretty, but it's still silly. Anyway, yesterday and today...

March 11 is ....... Johnny Appleseed Day and Worship of Tools Day (I didn't really like this day, so that could be part of why I chose not to update yesterday...that and the fact that I was asleep for a good majority of it. It seems like a very masculine, really manly day though. Just the day for that guy on Home Improvement. You know, for a show called Home Improvement, there wasn't a whole lot on that show which actually improved the home. Just a thought.)

March 12 is ....... Alfred Hitchcock Day (Yay Alfred Hitchcock! Alfred Hitchcock was the man. Really he was. He did all this cool stuff. I mean, the man brought us Psycho and The Birds for pete's sake. Any man who makes us fear motel owners and birds we see every day should be revered for the demi-god he is. And he showed his fat sihlouette (spelling?) to the world every week for years. The man rocked. Face it.)

Oh yeah. I thought that I would share this thing with you. Supposedly this is a joke. I really do wonder if there's any truth to it.

Can you imagine working for a company that has a little more than 500 employees and has the following statistics:

*29 have been accused of spousal abuse

*7 have been arrested for fraud

*19 have been accused of writing bad checks

*117 have directly or indirectly bankrupted at least two businesses

*3 have done time for assault

*71 cannot get a credit card due to bad credit

*14 have been arrested on drug-related charges

*8 have been arrested for shoplifting

*21 are currently defendants in lawsuits

*84 have been arrested for drunk driving in the last year

Can you guess which organization this is? Give up yet?

Its the 535 members of the United States Congress. The same group of idiots that crank out hundreds of new laws each year designed to keep the rest of us in line.

Like I said, if there's any truth to it, this explains a lot. And we should be very very scared. Who elected these people? Why don't we ever know these things when they happen? And how do they stay in office with records like these? All these are very good questions to which I will never get an answer b/c no one ever answers my questions. Oh well, here's...

The Word of the Day

comptroller (n. TRON-was-goot or re-mote kun-trohle)

1. a royal-household official who examines and supervises expenditures

2. a public official who audits government accounts and sometimes certifies expenditures

3. the chief accounting officer of a business or institution

If you think comptroller sounds like a mistaken spelling of controller, you're partially right. Today, comptroller is an established word that shares some, but not all, of its meanings with controller.

The term did originate as a misspelling, however. Around the 15th century, Middle English speakers altered the spelling of conterroller (meaning controller, from the Middle French contrerolleur) under the influence of the Middle French compte (account).(Random sidenote: compte can still be found in use today. The word for accountant for example.) The resulting word, comptroller, has attracted criticism over the years. Grammarian Henry Fowler condemned comptroller as "not merely archaic, but erroneous" in 1920, and a lexicographical column from 1931 agreed that comptroller is "erroneous and should not be accepted as correct." (Another random sidenote: I can't believe they actually have people who study this shit and debate and criticize whether or not a particular word should be used. I don't know how these people found jobs, much less how they actually get Paid for this crap.) Nevertheless, such modern institutions as colleges and governments continue to have comptrollers. Comptrollership occasionally turns up as well.

I don't know what else to put in here. I thought about ranting about this one subject, but was informed that it would be practically impossible to do without violating the tenents under which I established this diary. So I have to think about that one. Do I want to break my own rules? We'll see. I don't know. I guess I'll just put in a news snippet and go.

The Washington Post reported Sunday that the FBI was so proud of its secret spy tunnel beneath the Soviet -- later Russian -- Embassy that it offered tours of it to senior U.S. officials with top security clearances. A former government official who was offered a tour but declined because he is claustrophobic told the Post the tunnel was accessed from a residence near the Russian compound on Mount Alto, one of the highest points in Washington. The former official said the government purchased the home and started digging the tunnel out of the basement. Accused spy Robert Hanssen reportedly told Moscow about the eavesdropping operation. According to the Post, the Soviets used the FBI bugs and wiretaps to feed disinformation back to the U.S. government.

Ummm...how do you dig a fucking TUNNEL underneath an embassy without them knowing about it? And after you do so...offer tours of it?!?! That's a great way to keep a secret spy tunnel secret, I must say. Morons. I'm going to go be bored some more now. Anyone got any suggestions on what I should do? You could ICQ me.

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